Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize