Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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