Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I CAN MOONWALK!
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Randomize
