I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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