I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
