we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
