and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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