margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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