At least make sure they are 18
Why
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize