We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize