dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
