Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
