Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
