We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
