Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
