he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
high people should be assigned attendants
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize