East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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