why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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