I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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