I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I use my feet as sexual weapons
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
