just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
