quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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