You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
