My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
