Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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