I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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