Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
