So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
