idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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