someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
