Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
