omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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