I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
