hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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