I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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