if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
