Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
