It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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