STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
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