dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
4 words: hood of his car
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
