scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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