She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
