Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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