Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
