i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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