Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
