He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
