I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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