Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
