i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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