Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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